31. Other Drug Free Programmes

I’ve been neglecting my blog, but as I’ve yet to learn how to drive traffic to it, I’m just sat here talking to myself anyway for now! I have been researching, but as I said earlier I do not want to promote sites that sell or advise people to take medication for their difficulties, and there are a lot more that do, than don’t!

I’ve yet to find out if this is a competitor of the Dore Programme, but at Gifted Dyslexic at http://www.lesblind.is/aboutgifted/aboutgifted.cfm they appear to split each condition into segments, and charge £1,800 for a course of treatment for Dyslexia, then another £1,800 for the treatment of Dyscalculia, (the proper name for being rubbish at Maths!)

That’s convenient for them. I’m still on the lookout for a cheaper alternative, but only for now, as I cannot afford the Dore Programme yet.

Another Programme that was featured on GMTV recently is the www.tinsleyhouseclinic.co.uk Dr Robin Pauc’s programme is a lot cheaper, but is it as effective? His site doesn’t boast the testimonials that the Dore Programme does, but they say they can treat adults too. I’ve been advised to buy the book ‘Is That My Child?’ which I’ve ordered from Amazon.

30. Reading Age – Comprehension Age

At the Dore Presentation, Wynford Dore explained how children could score reasonably well with on their reading age but not so well on their comprehension age.

I asked Mr Dore if he could explain further as I couldn’t write my notes fast enough. He explained more about how the working memory affects the difference between the reading age and the comprehension age:

“It’s often noticed that children with a learning difficulty can score reasonably well with a reading age but far worse with their comprehension age. What we believe is happening is that many of the functions used during the process of reading have not been automatised.

Virtually everyone that goes through the Dore Programme is found to have serious problems with eye tracking, in other words they are unable to smoothly move their eyes across a line of words so that those words go into the brain in a smooth manner.

The fact that the eyes are jumping rather than moving smoothly suggests that that process has not been automatised and is, therefore, probably being controlled in working memory. The fuller working memory is with those things that have not been automatised and, therefore, should not really be there the less space is left for processing.

Thus for someone with a learning difficulty trying to read they may well be using up all their available working memory space just working out what that particular word means. They then move on to the next word and the process starts again.

The problem seems to be that after they have worked out what each individual word means they do not have the working memory capacity to retain that word and the subsequent ones in the sentence.

Thus the lack of working memory capacity will reduce the comprehension ability even though that person has been able to work out what each individual word means. It is, therefore, quite common and explainable that someone can have a good reading age but poor comprehension age.

And, of course, this makes all the difference between wanting to read for pleasure and not.” – Wynford Dore

www.dore.co.uk

29. Working Memory

I know my working memory is rubbish, because of the examples I gave in my Spelling post, and I cannot play the game ‘Answer the previous question’. If I was asked a series of questions and was required to not answer the first question until after the second question had been asked (and so on), I would fail after only one question – two if I’m lucky.

I also made a hopeless barmaid at college, because if someone wanted more than three drinks, I’d have to ask them again what the first one was.

Most people who don’t have learning disabilities can remember a substantial number of things at once, because they have automatised other tasks. However, people with learning disabilities haven’t automatised other tasks, such as reading, or hearing a sequence of numbers, so they are busy using up their working memory in order to simply process the information they are being given.

This means that there is very little available working memory left. I think of it as like using an overdraft! (something I can relate to!) I was wrong to say I have a ‘small working memory’ yesterday. I actually have the same working memory as most people, but it is being used to process information that should be automatised, so has a smaller available balance!

I once shared reading a book with a classmate, and she was finishing each page long before I was. So I asked her to read aloud at the same speed she was reading in her head, as I thought she was skipping some of the lines. Her response was that she was reading all the words, but at a much faster rate than she could speak (because it was automatised). I thought she was lying! Even now when I read, I imagine saying each word aloud.

See further information on working memory at:

http://www.learnplus.com/guides/learning-sys-memo.html
http://www.brainconnection.com/topics/?main=fa/working-memory
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Working_memory

28. Confidence and Mood Swings

I have bought loads of books on building confidence, and for the first few days I’ve felt great - then I’ve tried in vain to put them into practice, because I’ve forgotten most of the content. But I think even if I’d remembered, I’d still only be ‘papering over the cracks’ because the root of the problem must be in the fact that I know I have limitations. I now know those limitations are in the cerebellum.

I even bought a book on Nasty People and how to deal with them, as I could never stand up to them effectively, and now I know all the psychology behind why they behave that way (as I did when I was a child), and yet I can’t put it into practice because my working memory is so small, I still can’t speak effectively -the number of times I lose my thread during a conversation.

I’d love to know for sure that when I opened my mouth, something intelligent would come out, and people wouldn’t frown and wonder what I was on about! That I could speak without semi-stuttering, and stay focussed without going off on a tangent, then I’d have so much more confidence. And I believe this would have a snowball effect, because there are so many situations that I avoid at the moment.

And for years I was an unruly child, then an anarchic teenager, then had major mood swings as an adult. I joined a Bi Polar group because I thought I was manic depressive. A psychiatrist even said I might be, but she didn’t force me to take medication, because I wasn’t considered a danger to myself or anyone else.

This is why I related to Toyah so much, because she seemed to have the same problems as me when she was very young. The thing I am most looking forward to when I finally get on the Dore programme is to eliminate the mood swings, as Toyah did. I will have such a fulfilling life, because I’ll be much nicer to know!
www.dore.co.uk

27. Ozzy Osbourne - Paranoid

Ozzy Osbourne said he had ADHD. Let’s just recap the words to ‘Paranoid’ by Black Sabbath:

"Finished with my woman
'Cause she couldn't help me with my mind
People think I'm insane
Because I am frowning all the time

All day long I think of things
But nothing seems to satisfy
Think I'll lose my mind
If I don't find something to pacify

Can you help me, occupy my brain?
Oh yeah!

I need someone to show me
The things in life that I can't find
I can't see the things that make true Happiness,
I must be blind

Make a joke and I will sigh
And you will laugh and I will cry
Happiness I cannot feel
And love to me is so unreal

And so as you hear these words
Telling you now of my state
I tell you to enjoy life
I wish I could but it's too late"

It’s difficult to know if Ozzy was fully responsible for all the words, as the whole band are credited with all the song writing. But still, I bet Toyah could persuade Ozzy to attend the Dore Centre.
www.dore.co.uk

26. Stories of Inspiration

Whilst waiting for your free DVD from the Dore Centre, have a look at these pdf files:

http://www.dorecenters.com/files/SundayMail_Aug05.pdf

http://www.dorecenters.com/files/Toyah.pdf

When reading the one about Toyah, I was reminded again of one of the cerebellum exercises that they give you to do on the Dore Programme; walking downstairs whilst blindfolded!

OK, I’m sure it must adhere to all health and safety regulations, and there must be more to it than that, but my initial reaction was, “Well, a cracked skull would probably sort out most cerebellum problems…!”

I can only just manage going forwards with my eyes open!

But hey, Toyah survived didn’t she?
www.dore.co.uk

25. Astronauts' Balance Disorders

I talked earlier about the balance machines at the Dore Centres, which were developed by NASA to monitor astronauts’ balance progress after returning to earth. Wynford Dore has kindly sent me additional information after speaking at the Dore Presentation in Cardiff on March 21st, about the astronauts’ temporary difficulties.

“I’ve been trying hard to find the old astronauts balance problems link - I haven’t seen them for two or three years and they seem to have been taken off the various websites. One of the references I can remember clearly was a French - Russian mission where they described in detail the co-ordination problems experienced by cosmonauts when they returned to earth. Some of them were writing backwards, some of them had orientation problems, a number of them had travel sickness problems for a while. When we first started doing our research one of our specialists went to America to discuss with the expert that had been working with NASA on the development of the equipment we subsequently obtained. NASA have constantly denied that astronauts have “dyslexic problems”. We know some of the symptoms they suffer temporarily are exactly the same as those that are suffered every day by some people.” – Wynford Dore

Astronaut David Wolf also said in National Geographic that upon his return to earth, balance problems caused him to run into doors.

There is more information on astronauts’ balance disorders at:
http://www.spaceref.com/news/viewpr.html?pid=11919

And general information on balance disorders at:
http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/balance/balance_disorders.asp

www.dore.co.uk

24. Clumsiness

I have always been clumsy and quite heavy handed, when opening and closing cupboard doors for example, and when I write I press quite hard.

The more tired I am, the worse I am, but I’m not too bad when I go out. I think I subconsciously know to be more careful!

I did some research on Clumsiness and was interested to find that several sources claim that hand/ eye co-ordination exercises help clumsiness. Tennis and Ping Pong are supposed to help quite a lot, and positive and calm imagery, as stated at:
http://www.mothernature.com/Library/Bookshelf/Books/16/42.cfm

It also states that rolling a stick on top of two other sticks, in the shape of an ‘H’ will improve Clumsiness. I wonder if this is because it stimulates the cerebellum? That sounds easy to do, and I always have old wrapping paper tubes lying around (I’m a hoarder!)

(Later) Woohoo! A co-ordination exercise I can do first time! I may have been cheating by using very long tubes with a considerable overlap to stop the top tube from falling off, but I found it easy and quite therapeutic. I made the rule that you can only hold the two parallel tubes and not let the horizontal one fall off the end or touch your hands. I think it’s rather similar to doing a hill start in a car, in relation to the pressure and speed that you allow the top tube to travel.

If I didn’t have more pressing things to do, I could do this all evening! Parents! Save money on expensive toys! Give your kid three tubes and tell them to make an ‘H’!
www.dore.co.uk

23. Dogs With ADHD Part2

OK, I may have been joking yesterday when I said The Dore Centre plans to include dogs in their Training Centres (my contribution to April Fool’s Day – I’ll cross off ‘comedienne’ shall I, from my Miscellaneous List of Possible Careers?) but it’s not beyond the realms of possibility for dogs to have ADHD, is it? I mean, in theory, anything that possesses a brain could have it.

I did a bit of online research, and found that some sites that mention dogs with ADHD, dwell on the ‘Hyperactivity’ part of ADHD a bit too much (well I guess it’s difficult to test most dogs’ spelling) and I’m having trouble finding any sites at all on ADHD that don’t suggest medication, which I do NOT want to promote.

Talking of spelling, I was tempted yesterday to write that the Dore Centre has facilities for testing dogs’ memory, balance, co-ordination and spelling! But I thought that would make it a bit too obvious. Although I have no doubt that someone could teach a clever dog to spell certain words, with enough buttons, bells and whistles, if that person had a lot of time on their hands!

Maybe it’s not a ludicrous idea to test and try to treat dogs for ADHD. If a good drug free programme is devised, I doubt there’ll be a shortage of customers.

22. Dogs With ADHD

Of course humans are not the only creatures who can have ADHD and other learning disabilities. Since 2001 dogs too have been tested for the condition. Some findings can be found here at:
http://www.ahherald.com/senior/2005/ss050428_adhd_dogs.htm

I had a chat with Wynford Dore at the Dore Presentation in Cardiff about his involvement with ADHD dogs at Crufts UK earlier this year. Go to:
www.bbc.co.uk/crufts

The Dore Centre at Kenilworth, Warwickshire already has facilities to test dogs on their memory, balance and co-ordination and a Canine Dore Programme is due to be available from September. Mr Dore hopes that by 2009 there will be as many Canine Dore Training Centres worldwide as there are for people.
www.dore.co.uk

21. Spelling and Memory

I’ve already been to the Dore Centre in Cardiff for an initial assessment, and two members of staff say I’m suitable for the programme, but I’m concerned they may say I’m not suitable when they assess me further because I’m good at spelling and I’m sure I could easily remember loads of animals in a minute. Actually let’s try that:

The girl on The Tonight Programme could think of 22 animals within a minute on her first attempt, and six months later she got 28 animals within a minute.

Wow! It was a lot harder than I thought. I got 25, but I think I said ‘Tiger’ twice. So I’m not that good at all!

I’m deliberately not going to practice that, or when I do get to go on the programme, my results won’t be accurate. Or maybe they can give me a list of something else to think of that makes me think on my feet.

Maybe I’m deluded about spelling as well. I remember I often got high scores at school, but there was no pressure. I’m only good at spelling if I write the word down. Most of the time if a word looks wrong to me, it is wrong. But then if a word looks wrong, wouldn’t that be using the creative part of the brain? And not the cerebellum? I can always cope with diagrams much better than text.

And I always have a real problem when I’ve mistyped something. I go back and because the word is unrecognisable, I don’t know which letters to change, and for some reason I have to close one eye to see it properly (though my sight’s fine).

I always type ‘form’ instead of ‘from’, which is ironic, because I hate forms! Every ‘from’ you see will have been amended from ‘form’!

I’ve watched these spelling contests, and the kids on there are so fast! I’d have to think for a second or two in between each letter. And they say the word at the beginning and at the end really fast – I definitely can’t do that. Whatever happens I’m hopeful that the Dore Programme can sort me out!
www.dore.co.uk

20. My Biggest Ever Goof

The undercharging camera story (from yesterday’s post) gets worse: When I was a student, I was working in a camera store and it was the last Saturday before Christmas, so the shop was packed with impatient shoppers. To look at their faces petrified me because I hate keeping people waiting, and I couldn’t cope with the stress.

A lady said she wanted a camera for her husband for Christmas for about £100. So I showed her three and she opted for one for £119.00, the Canon Sureshot Telemax, that had its own little box, carrying case, strap, two batteries, two films and two little photo albums all included in a large kit box.

Our computers always added the .00 on the end of the price because all the products were rounded up to a pound. So I keyed the price into the credit card machine the same as I’d keyed into the computer; 119, but it only registered £1.19.

I went off for two weeks for the holidays, completely oblivious. When I came back I was told that the shop had contacted the bank, the bank had rung the customer and left a message on the answerphone. The husband then heard it, so he now knew what he was getting for Christmas.

An angry wife came back to pay the difference. Then Christmas day arrived. The husband, (probably) opens his wife’s present first, because he knows what it is, and wants to photograph the kids opening their presents. He knows he has everything in the kit box to start taking photos immediately.

So he removes the wrapping, opens the kit box, takes out the two little photo albums, the two films, the two batteries, the strap, the carrying case and …an empty box. On Christmas eve, the staff had done a stock-take and found a lonely little Canon Sureshot Telemax sitting on a shelf with no home. The shop gave her the camera and a £10 gift voucher, but she’d been under no obligation to pay the full amount even if the camera had been in its box.

So let’s recap: I charge £1.19 for all those goodies? Even without the camera, it’s still a bargain if you ask me. Who says I’m not talented? When I goof things up, I do a proper job.

19. You Know You Have ADHD When…

• You forget you take sugar in your own tea
• You leave your shopping on the bus
• You dump your fella and post your own (last) key through his letterbox, instead of his
• You mix Jerry Adams up with Jerry Hall in your university interview – but still get in
• You charge for postage after weighing your item on Ebay, before you’ve wrapped it up
• You turn up a day early for a job interview
• You have to pay the taxi fare in postage stamps
• You don’t have any right angles on the bathroom cabinet you made in Woodwork
• You turn your house upside down looking for the sunglasses that are on your head
• You charge a customer £1.19 for a £119.00 camera
• You look up a word in a dictionary, get distracted by other words, and forget the word
• You become a photographer because most books on the subject are full of pictures
• You omit two pints of vegetable stock from your home made vegetable soup
• You have to sit on deck on the cross channel ferry, in the rain, watching the horizon
• You have to buy a replica of your expensive camera because you lost the charger
• You get 240 mph when working out the speed for the 4 minute mile
• You’re caught tucking toilet rolls in the door of the fridge – I was being harrassed, OK?
• You can’t find your time management book; ‘Getting Things Done’
• You write down the patient’s name from a Hand X-ray; ‘RT Scaphoid’
• You crash into an empty, parked police car and tell them it was a stupid place to park

18. Why Create This Blog?

I need to be self employed because of health reasons. I have a bad back, and lots of other pain, which I’m certain is TMS (Tension Myositis Syndrome, an idea pioneered by John E Sarno MD, which I won’t try to explain here. See reviews for his book, 'The Mindbody Prescription' on Amazon, but ignore the one by the person who clearly hasn’t read the book).

Although I’m a photographer I want to work from home more so that I can control my working conditions more easily. I started off wanting to learn web design, after studying modules in Film and Graphic Design on my Photography course, and Web Design on a Post Graduate course.

I found that I knew what looked good, and what didn’t, but I was struggling with the technical aspects. So from web design, I got into internet marketing, though I still have a lot to learn, and I’m struggling with that too. One of the first and easiest steps is to publish a blog, on any subject you want. As I write this I have no comments from readers on any of my posts, but slowly I’m learning how to drive traffic to the site. And when I know what I’m doing I’ll have my own sites with their own domains on other subjects.

At the moment I’m really frustrated that it’s taking me so long to learn it all, but if I hadn’t spent so much time online in the past few months, I wouldn’t have discovered I had ADHD, and whatever other learning difficulties I have; I wouldn’t have found out about Sarno’s work, etc. So I think I’m lucky and very pleased to be on the right road at last.

At first, I thought ‘What will I write every day?’ (you have to post every day to be listed in the search engines, at least until you get lots of people linking to the site) And now you can’t shut me up! I’ve spent all morning writing the next five posts – (or is that the last five?!)

Oh, and for people in the UK, no I don’t stay up all night posting. The times displayed on the blog are EST in the US, so they’re 8 hours behind us.

Once I become interested in something, I become really interested in it! So the Dore Programme is what I want to promote, until I can go on it myself, then I can document my real progress, instead of just being a wannabe! I think it’s because it’s such a new and relatively unknown drug-free treatment, that has had astounding results and could literally change the lives of millions of people – that I feel I have to promote it!

www.dore.co.uk

17. My Song About Frustration

Having learning difficulties means that even the most mundane days can be stressful. I wrote a song about my personal frustrations in 1988 when I was going through a really bad depression. Of course I thought I was the only person in the world who felt like that.

I saw happy people around me and wondered how they could cope with a normal life, with so many demands made upon them. Family members, friends, colleagues, employers all telling you what to do. I got angry when I saw job vacancies that said, “Must be able to work under pressure”.

‘Why?’ I’d think, ‘Why should anyone have to put up with that kind of stress?’ Pressure doesn’t necessarily mean stress for everyone, but I couldn’t understand this. A normal day was immense pressure for me, as I got so many interactions wrong.

I’ve written lots of songs, since I was twelve, some of which I still like, but the tune to this one is particularly hideous, so you’re not missing much by just seeing the words:


Scream

Everybody
Seems so organized
How can they be
So easily satisfied?

They always say
The right things at the right time
Straight away
They always notice the signs

Where do they go
When they have their off-days?
And how do they know
How to behave?

Where do they find
Happiness? Don’t they have dreams?
And how can they smile
When they want to scream?

16. The Dore Centre on TV

The Dore Centre (then known as the DDAT Centre) was featured on The Tonight Programme with Trevor McDonald in the UK in 2002.

If you’ve not yet got your free DVD, get it from www.dore.co.uk and on there is a copy of The Tonight Programme.

The research was referred to as a ‘revolutionary breakthrough’ for dyslexia. And that’s all the researchers were trying to do at first. But as I said earlier they found that development of the cerebellar function helped with a lot more problems too. Almost everything we do involves balance or co-ordination.

The programme features Wynford Dore and his daughter Susie, who was a guinea-pig for the treatment. Initially participants are assessed to see what they can and can’t do. They are asked to spell and remember lists, among other things.

They are strapped onto a balance machine, that was developed by NASA, to test their balance disorder. (I know I’ll fall when I get on there!)

We are shown some of the balance and co-ordination exercises that need to be repeated for ten minutes, twice a day. They include throwing and catching beanbags and walking in a circle around a chair, and we are told about how eye tracking is important, as people with dyslexia don’t read easily from left to right; their eyes wander all over the place.

The cameras followed three sufferers of dyslexia over a six month period, and watched them benefit from the programme. I was interested to learn that the (then) ‘Last Government Report’ found that 1 in 5 school children, and 70% of all offenders have a learning difficulty. Wow - That’s an awful lot!

Professor David Reynolds (then of Exeter University) is former Head of the Government’s Numeracy Taskforce.

He studied the effects of 50 dyslexic children and over six months their reading performances improved three times as much as 50 average children. Their writing and spelling also improved.

The programme concluded with the founder, Wynford Dore expressing his next ambition;
“We should not consider denying this type of help from every child and every adult that would benefit from it.”

And two of the children whose spelling, reading and writing improved imensely, express their astonishment at finding the repetition of what seemed to be ‘fun’ exercises, was responsible for their improvement in academic areas.

For years, children have been pumped full of drugs that at the least have stripped them of any personality. This still goes on today, and it is due to total ignorance.

I often wonder what my life would have been like if my family knew I had ADHD and dyspraxia. I guess I have to remain thankful that things happened as they did, as I too could have been one of those poor zombified creatures.

At the presentation last week in Cardiff I met several people who had come to know about the Dore Centre after watching The Tonight Programme. I may be mistaken, but there is a good chance I saw it too. More and more things are falling into place. If I did see it at the time, I would have simply thought that it was a great idea for people with dyslexia – not me!

15. All the Posts on this Blog

BTW, to view all the posts from one month, on one page, click on the Month in 'Archives', then read from the bottom up!

For some reason, they're not all listed on the right hand side.

14. Daydreaming

I have always been a daydreamer. When I was five years old my school sent a letter to my Mum to say they would no longer have me at school dinners, because I’d still be sat chewing my food, at the end of the second sitting, when I’d gone in with the children on the first sitting. So I had to go home for lunch.

I got quicker at eating my food, but never stopped daydreaming. I used to hate myself because of it, but one of my ambitions is to write a successful screenplay, and I’ve discovered that all writers need to daydream, or how else would they think of things to write? I’m in the process of trying to allocate periods to be creative, but as yet have been unsuccessful in stopping myself from ‘drifting off’ at inappropriate times, such as when getting ready to go out – hence why I am always late.

Whilst online researching, I’ve found that learning a second language later on in life is widely believed to keep Alzheimer's at bay. Part of this research says that when you are daydreaming, your brain is in its most relaxed state, and doesn’t have enough stimulation, ie; the failure to tax the brain can be the culprit of deterioration; the old ‘If you don’t use it, you lose it’ theory.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/health/healthmain.html?in_article_id=362218&in_page_id=1774 Keep learning to keep your brain young.

So I need to listen up! OK, so I reckon I’m still allowed to daydream as long as it’s not time wasted. For example, whenever I have an idea for a film plot or dialogue, I write it down in my infamous ‘Screenplay’ book. One day, I hope I’ll put them all together and actually write a complete screenplay. But for now they are separate little bite sized chunks of waffle filling three A5 lined notebooks.

Since adulthood I always believed my daydreaming was as a result of the mental abuse I had every day from my mother. I thought it was my way of escaping the psychological trauma of my constant battles with her, and my futile efforts to get her to love me. But could it have been due to ADHD? If concentration is so difficult, then it would make sense that I felt I needed to ‘switch off’.

Or was it because I was always creative? After all, Robert Frost and Frank Lloyd Wright both got into trouble at school for daydreaming. See http://borntoexplore.org/cramond.htm

Stop Daydreaming! - pick up your free DVD at:
www.dore.co.uk

13. Childhood Problems Part2

When I was a child, whenever someone asked me a question, I would often say ‘Pardon?’ and they would repeat the question. This was an automatic strategy I’d come up with to not only think of an answer, but to give myself time to process what I’d been asked.

My mother knew I wasn’t deaf, but she didn’t realise why I did it. She either assumed it was just a bad habit I’d formed to annoy her, or she realised I was stalling her, but was too impatient to put up with it. She would often shout ‘Repeat what I just said!’ which I always could, parrot-fashion, but still not necessarily having registered what it meant. Then she’d tell me off for pretending to be deaf, and ask me why I did it, but I didn’t know why. This happened an awful lot and the constant reprimanding had a very negative effect on my self esteem.

I was once in trouble with a deputy head teacher for producing sloppy work, and I tried to explain to her that I was slower than the other children because my brain worked differently to theirs. She threw her head back and laughed, saying ‘Nice Try!’ or something similar, because she knew I was intelligent, and couldn’t believe I was slow.

At the time I was flattered that she thought I was intelligent, but very frustrated that she didn’t believe me. She threw my Maths book down on my desk (my worst subject) and said ‘Paula, I wouldn’t have you in my class’. Her conclusion was that I was lazy, and I even started to doubt my own beliefs, and believe that she was right.

Although I remember this incident in detail, similar misunderstandings would happen on a daily basis. I guess I often said and did things that contradicted my intelligence. So people would believe I was deliberately being difficult. I was labelled as a naughty child. So then what happened? Of course I had to live up to my reputation.

12. Childhood Problems

Though I tried often, I could never do handstands or cartwheels (and still can’t). This along with not being able to ride a bike as quickly as other kids, I’m told is a form of dyspraxia.

I never thought I was dyslexic, as I was always good at spelling and grammar, but have always been incredibly slow. And ask me to fill a form in, and it will take me a long time to read and understand it. Also, I’m hopeless at reading out allowed, and jump ahead of myself reading words the wrong way round. So this is a problem dyslexics have. Often I will read words from the line above or below the line I’m reading and end up making up a sentence of my own! I once knocked on the wrong door because I was looking for 45 Salisbury Rd, and the sign at the end of the street said;

Salisbury Road
leading to
Park Road

For some bizarre reason I read it from the bottom up - as ‘Park Road leading to Salisbury Road’ - and they were four-inch high letters! So I also walked a lot further than I needed to – story of my life!

I never mastered Maths especially Algebra, because they were sums within sums, and I kept forgetting why we started the main sum in the first place. I failed Maths O level at 16, but took it up at nightschool at 23, but only turned up for three lessons. I then took it up when I wanted to teach at 32, and again gave up after a few weeks.

Even now I often read the first few pages of a book then give up. Sometimes I force myself to read a chapter a day, and I’m not allowed to change books until I’ve got to the end. But a chapter a day can mean you spend a whole month reading a book. I’m way too slow at everything.

If you think my writing in this blog seems ok, I do it in Word first, and have to rewrite it at least five times. And thank heavens the software lets you edit afterwards.